I decided to spend this past Christmas with one of my cousin’s, because I haven’t seen them in about two years. So I figured I could surprise them last year. It was really good and I enjoyed myself, but when I got home, I had my Christmas gift waiting for me.
In my culture, whenever you see an elderly person or you are given a gift from them, it is customary that the ladies kneel down to show appreciation or greeting, while the men were to prostrate. Well, we have certainly been living in England for a while now so we, the young ones tend to forget our tradition. It’s bad!
So opening the gift that was given to me from my mother and her sister, I just said thank you so much and began to walk away, when my mother’s sister called me back and said the words ‘familiarity breeds’ contempt’ and I should thank them the traditional way, which I did.
I forget a lot of things, I mean a lot. I put something here and the next minute I forget and the search party starts or I was supposed to ring my mother and by the time I remember, the day had gone. I am forever grateful for the intervention of technology, the beauty of just saying “Siri, remind me to text or call a friend or buy this thing from the supermarket.
While reading the scripture, I came upon a very popular verse Luke 22:19- And he took bread, and gave thanks and broke it and gave it to them saying, “This is My body which is given for you.This do in remembrance of Me”.
Also 1 Corinthians 11: 25-26 ‘in the same manner also he took the cup when he sipped, saying “This cup is the New Testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as yedrink it, in remembrance of me”. For as often as ye eat this bread and drink this cup, ye do show the Lord’s death until he comes.
It has been an amazing year and I cannot believe I would be adding a year to my age in a week time. Last year, I never imagined I would be in a position of writing and helping people and I am grateful for the gifts that God has shown me. I have realised that the more I get older, the more I realise that life isn’t always easy. Some people have it good as we see, while others struggle through their lifetime, but ultimately at one point in our lives we’ll all be faced with a choice to make, which changes things some for the better or for worse. For others either way it would still hurt.
I spent most of my life trying to be like people I knew everyone liked and by then hoping to be liked by people not knowing by doing so, I was losing the very essence of myself. I am glad that the pain I experienced taught me something about myself and helped me become the woman I am now today.
I remember my first heartbreak, I remember that day, I was still a girl but I had to grow up that day. Tears kept pouring down my cheeks and no one seems to care about it, so doing what I thought was best, which was to pack the broken pieces of my heart and hide them away so people wouldn’t see that I am bleeding, then have a fresh start.
Which was what I did, I became a good girl, followed all the rules and make everyone proud, until I was heartbroken again. How can I be broken from the broken pieces? This makes it another wound. I did the same thing again, I was the girl with the smiley face and the encourager, I have always had things under control, and I put layers on myself and acted like all was well.
I did move on with my life; for sometime I thought so, but you cannot keep running away from pain all of our lives. I thought I could until; I got a gunshot wound from the person I cared about most in my life. I cried I thought I had no tears again or I made myself believe I had no tears to cry again and was torn between letting my pride down and allowing people to know how badly I was hurt and not always being the perfect one.
Hello! I'm Esther and this blog is where I share my heart, thoughts, experiences and lessons life teaches me. I hope that you take something away that impacts you positively and I look forward to hearing & seeing more of you. Love Esther.