Most times, when I wake up or I am about on my day-to-day-business, it feels as if no one sees me or even notice me, sometimes in my flat, I feel as if my flatmates don’t think I exist. I talk to them, but it just looks like I am not seen at all and same in my family. It got me wondering if it’s the same with God. I know He loves me and He’s always there by my side but at times especially, in times like this, it feels like He has forgotten me or doesn’t see me or He chooses not to see me.
It felt like the fog of doubt, loneliness and fear of darkness was never going get out from my life. I have prayed, fasted, trusted and claimed all the promises God has for me in the bible. However, it really still felt like I wasn’t seen, heard or noticed, now that I put myself in a depressing mode. I kept questioning and pushing things so that people or maybe God will acknowledge, but no, that didn’t work. So I decide to quit and wallow in my difficultly since no one saw me or God wasn’t ready to hear me, I might just sit down and stay there till God knows when.
As I was reading the book of Genesis, I found that one person felt this way, abandoned, forsaken, forgotten, and lonely and I know most people can resonate with that, her name was Hagar. Like me, Hagar thought that all the promises God sent concerning her was never going to come to pass, now the she was a desert of loneliness and felt forgotten, but she had an encounter with the Lord and she knew for sure that she wasn’t forgotten
Genesis 16: 13: So Hagar named the Lord who spoke to her, “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “Here I have seen one who sees me!”
As Hagar saw the Lord and He told her that He hadn’t not forgotten her, that she was precious in His sight, I have held this hope and for sure, He sees me, He sees you, in the difficultly life throws at me and you. He sees that and He knows my struggles, even the trouble that keeps me awake at night and can’t tell anyone about…He sees it and guess what? He cries when we cry, He dances when we dance, He is right there with me, every step of the way, the bible tells us in Joshua 1:9 That we should not be afraid, because the Lord our God will be with us WHEREVER we go. Now, that’s a word for my soul, this verse reminds me that no matter the situation I am in, he has got my back, and He watches me and I am not forgotten.
The truth is that every tear I shed He keeps them and He’s making all things work together for good and in the end I’ll come out like gold that has been refined and I will be stronger. I pray that in this month, we will look up to God and trust Him as our El-Roi the “God that sees us”, loves us and knows and the troubles we face in this side of heaven He’s with us. He is on your side my precious darling…..